Send Them Off Right
Helen Cernigliaro
In the time-honored tradition of taking the bride and groom out for one last final fling before they tie the knot, there are a few thingsthe party thrower should keep in mind. Bachelor parties used to be grudgingly accepted as the ultimate, knockdown blowout for the groom to get all the craziness out of his system before he attaches himself to the ‘old ball and chain’. Since then, both bachelorette and bachelor parties have gotten equal billing. Today, there are a lot of great ways to celebrate and get all the fun and excitement out of the last hoorah while still keeping it clean.
A fun, yet sensible send-off for the bride and groom should be held a week or two before the wedding, not the night before. This is because a fair amount of drinking could occur and the bride and groom wouldn’t want blood-shot eyes or dark shadows staring back at them from their wedding photos. As they exchange their vows, the couple will want fresh faces, clear eyes, and calm stomachs. (Butterfly flutters are expected, but hangovers, just won’t fly.)
The best man and maid of honor are usually the ones who plan the prospective parties. It can range from a small group of people to a large gathering. The attendees are the members of the wedding party, family, and very close friends. If they want to throw a larger bash, they can increase the guest list to include whoever is coming to the wedding.
If guests are coming from out of town, the host needs to be sure those guests have ample time to set aside the day. This is as easy as sending out Save-the-Date cards.
Next up, the host should plan what kind of party it is going to be, what the financial considerations are, what type of venue it’s going to be held in, and how everyone is going to get safely from Point A to Point B?
The bride’s and groom’s personalities should be taken into account, as well. The last thing the bride or groom needs is pressure to go out and do what their friends think is his or her idea of a good time. If one half of the happy couple wants to party all night, let them. However, be careful of how much liquor they have to drink and where they might wander off to.
With that in mind, remember in all likelihood, members of the bride’s and groom’s families will no doubt take notice of how the future spouses behaved on their party night. Best to err on the side of caution and behave thyself.
The maid of honor/ best man should make a mature decision as to what would make their friends happy. Would a night out on the town or a steak dinner with close friends followed by few drinks at a local club thrill them?
For the girls’ night out, the bride’s attendants could give her a bright, white feather boa to let everyone know she’s the lucky lady getting married. A concert by the bride’s favorite musical group could be a fun way to spend the evening.
A weekend at a spa would be relaxing, or consider an old-fashioned pajama party at the maid of honor’s house. How about a striptease lesson? Her groom might even thank you! Dinner at the bride’s favorite restaurant followed by after-dinner drinks at her favorite hotspot would be thoughtful.
A surprise luncheon with her attendants, family, and friends is always a favorite, or a weekend at a sunny location for some R & R might fit the bill.
And for the boys? How about a weekend away with the fellas, doing the ‘guy thing’? Think whitewater rafting, a hiking trip, a golf outing, or skiing. Go ahead and plan that weekend in Atlantic City, Foxwoods, or Las Vegas. What about box seats to the groom’s favorite sporting event? A ‘groom’s roast,’ at his favorite restaurant, where his male family and friends honor him with anecdotes of their many experiences growing up with him would be fun. Just remember to keep these little treasures short and funny, not mean-spirited.
A growing trend, which has become quite popular, is a couple celebratingtheir final party night as single people – together. Many couples meet up after having spent time apart with their own set of partygoers.
Some opt for a casino party, BBQ, or cooking something for their guests at home. Others go to dinner together followed by dancing into the wee hours of the morning. Several couples go to a concert or play, or go away for the weekend with their wedding party. Still others decide on just plain silly outings like scavenger hunts with outrageously funny lists of things they have to acquire.
Of course, there should be either designated drivers or a limousine doing the driving for the night. Having a limo, van, or coach bus to drive everyone around adds to the fun of the evening, while ensuring everyone gets home safe and sound.
For any party that includes drinking, this should be a non-negotiable issue. Many limousine companies often cater to bachelorette and bachelor parties.
Whatever your wedding party chooses, separate parties or together, be sure to make it safe and fun. Have a great time and build some great memories. Don’t forget the camera, take plenty of pictures, and make at least one of them a fun group shot that you can treasure when you remember that night.