Dance Lessons Give Newlyweds First-Dance Confidence
Lorna Rothanzl
The moment you join hands for that first dance as man and wife is magical. It’s often the first chance newlyweds have to be alone together since vows were exchanged. Though you’re alone on the dance floor, you’re also the focal point at your reception.
For this reason, many couples plan for their first dance in the weeks and months before their wedding. Across the country professional dance instructors have noted a surge in the number of to-be-weds on their student rosters.
“Often bridal couples take dance lessons as they don’t want to embarrass themselves at their wedding,” said Mary Schaufert, central office manager with the United States Amateur Ballroom Dancers Association. This group is the governing body for amateur ballroom dance competitions in the U.S.
Schaufert said dance lessons are usually a last-minute thought by bridal couples, but become a welcomed diversion from the wedding planning routine.
“These students often find that dancing is a great couple activity and will continue to dance long after their weddings,” Schaufert said. “But first couples should check out all of their dance instruction options.”
Dance lessons are available as group classes, private studio instruction or in-home video or Internet displays. As you visit studios, discuss an instructor’s experience to find the style right for you. Contact local civic organizations such as the YMCA or adult education programs at area colleges that often offer dance classes.
If you survey friends and family, you may be directed to the renowned Arthur Murray Dance Studio. Since Arthur Murray himself began teaching dance in 1912, couples have turned to the industry legend for guidance.
“A lot of our clients are getting married or are participating in a wedding in some capacity and want to learn to dance,” said Tony Cardinali, First Vice President of Franchise Relations with Arthur Murray Dance Studios International. “Couples can learn a variety of dances or just how to dance to their selected wedding song.”
Many couples present their wedding party with dance lessons so everyone will feel confident. Since Arthur Murray Studios are located throughout the world, it’s possible for a bridesmaid in another state to take lessons similar to attendants living in your community.
“That way all of the members of your wedding party have participated in the same, common dance system and are all on the same page at your wedding reception,” Cardinali said.
Dance lessons can also be an icebreaker for individuals paired up in your wedding party. If your high school pal and your groom’s college roommate are to dance together, it’s nice for them to give it a whirl at a studio before they dance at your reception.
Often the bride will suggest dance lessons in reaction to the groom’s concern over the reception dance.
“The groom is typically the one who worries about that first dance the most,” Cardinali said. “This will be the first time he’s holding his wife and he’ll have an audience. Most grooms want this dance to be traditional, practical and proper and may feel pressure if their dancing skills are limited.”
But lessons aren’t only for those who’ve never twirled on the dance floor. Even skilled couples seek instruction for their wedding day dance, especially if their focus is on their dancing.
“A lot of people want to choreograph their first dance,” Cardinali said. “These couples typically start about six months before their wedding and work with their chosen song to develop a unique dance. These lessons become a special time for couples and they look forward to meeting once or twice a week on the dance floor.”
But watch out – you may find dancing is such fun that you and your spouse may want to permanently incorporate the activity into your social life.
Kathy Levyn, owner of Dancing for Life in Los Angeles, said bridal couples either learn one dance for their wedding in the few weeks before the event, or begin lessons months and even a year in advance to learn every step imaginable.
“Couples just don’t want to stand on the dance floor and move back and forth anymore,” Levyn said. “They spend so much time and resources on their attire and appearance and they want to dance their best, too.”
Angela Fleagle, owner of Our First Dance in Seattle, began teaching dance after her own wedding instruction.
“I had such a wonderful time with my husband preparing for our wedding and our first dance,” Fleagle said. “I had been teaching dance before we married, and realized how special planning for that first dance can be.”
Fleagle said a couple’s nervousness or expectations might shy them away from dance lessons.
“They’re always relieved and happy to find that they are learning basic dance and it’s not difficult at all, regardless of their coordination or interest level,” she said. “People are no longer satisfied with hanging on to their spouse and swaying on the dance floor. They want to pick a special song and comfortably dance a few steps at their wedding.”
If you’re only concerned with the first dance, adequate instruction can be received in two or three lessons. If you want to learn different styles and choreograph your own dance, extensive instruction is for you.
“Often it can be like pulling teeth to get the groom to work on the first dance at all,” Fleagle said. “Then once they begin, a lot of couples want to learn a few different steps so they can dance throughout the reception.”
You may find that dancing conditions in a studio will be quite different than dancing at your reception. Instructors will need to know the type of dance floor surface at your reception site. Wood, marble, carpet or even grass surfaces will impact your dancing styles.
It’s also wise to wear dance lesson shoes similar to those to be worn on the wedding day. Even your gown style will determine the types of dances to attempt. A hoop skirt or large bustle may limit you to a simple first dance so that you and your attire finish in one piece.
You and your fiancé are in for some fun as you prepare for your first dance as a married couple. Working with a professional instructor will help to address details you might overlook. Such readiness can alleviate hesitation and nervousness, and allow you to dance together with confidence and ease as you dance your way into married life.